funk, weekend adventure, and a reminder

Well I must really be out of it because I didn't even notice that I'd been hijacked. Life has felt hard these days and I'm exhausted, like I've got a dark cloud over my head and I can't seem to keep my eyes open exhausted. We had a busy weekend, mostly because I felt that I could shake the cloud if I constantly did stuff. It didn't work but was a good distraction. Here's some evidence that my children could use a little downtime.

We started the weekend off right with a trip to Mcormick's & Shmicks happy hour. If you have one of these near you, go tonight. It is amazing. I actually took a picture of my turkey wrap with marionberry spread because it was that good. And only $1.95! Ben and I started going in Chicago and were thrilled to find out we had one near us out here. It is something we always enjoy. Especially outside during an unexpected and thoroughly appreciated heat wave.

Then we decided to take the kids up to the Mt. Hood national forest for a hike. It was right along a river and we saw these huge salmon headed upstream. The kids did great and it was beautiful.

Nothing like fried chicken to complete a healthy day in the outdoors

These fish must have been over 3 feet long!

So I went to the first day of my women's bible study today and realized that I have so much to be thankful for. There are women who have lost so much and I am just experiencing some uninvited hormones. My children are healthy and my husband has a job and we have enough money to provide for our family and God is good. All the time. I can't stop thinking about the passage in Exodus where God is leading his children out of Egypt. They are so close to escaping and then He tells them to turn back and go to this land between the desert and the sea. He takes them to this place where they are out of options. All the people, of course, freak out and get mad and don't understand why God would put them in this terrible situation. God says that his plan is to gain glory for himself so they will all know that he is God. We know that God can change our situation but sometimes he doesn't and it pisses us off. I love what Moses says in 14:14: "The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still." I can't help but cry every time I read that. God will fight for me when I feel desperate and alone and sad. I just need to trust Him and be still.

Ben in Real Life: Guest Blog

Today we almost pressed our own cider at some kind of roadside pioneer festival. Alas, they were out of apples, so we just bought a jug for $6. Good times!

Weaning overshare part 2

So I think it's been about a week since Ian and my breasts have parted ways. First there were temper tantrums and unexplained crying episodes, then there were the sleepless nights and clinginess. And then came a trip to home depot to pick out paint samples for the living room. Oh you thought I was talking about Ian? No, Ian is the same sweet boy he always is, drinking his bottle happily and only boob lunging one time. I, however am a complete mess. You'd think I would have seen this coming but what could I have done anyway. I think I could move past this if my body wasn't constantly reminding me of my decision. I am so sore that I can't even hold Ian without shrieking every time he brushes against me. I know I need to go buy cabbage leaves and drink sage tea but I barely have time to put a bra on in the morning, let alone stuff it with vegetables. And the paint I chose for the living room? Poppyseed. I know what you're thinking. "Rebekah, that's just another word for black." And maybe it is but it doesn't matter anyway because Ben vetoed it and we settled on black orchid. Which really just turned out purple. I wanted black. But apparantly I'm not allowed to make anymore home decorating decisions until I've stopped spontaneously crying for at least a week.

You know it's time to hire a cleaning lady when...

ALL of your son's clothes look like this after being let loose around the house for an hour.

Now even inanimate objects are telling me that my house is a mess.

ballerina

Weaning overshare

Well I knew this day would come. This morning I took Ian out of his crib and started nursing. He hung around for about 30 seconds before giving me "the look." Some of you may know what I'm talking about. This look says, "uh mom, I love you I really do, and your boobs are great but you and I both know that this is really just for show and I'm only getting about an ounce of milk a day from you, (pause to smile sweetly and then suck thumb) I mean this is really nice of you to try and drag this out as long as possible but why don't we just nip this in the bud and go downstairs, make me a bottle and we'll be done with it, ok?" I could reason that maybe I'll prevent one or two future ear infections if I keep trying. I could argue with him and tell him that he's probably my last baby and this has been an amazing bonding experience. But it won't make a difference and I should just be thanking him for hanging in there for this long, and bringing me through swimsuit season and one last hurrah as a "near" C cup. The last time I did this my doctor prescribed me antidepressants, so let's hope I handle it a little better with this one.

Reason #57...

...why I love my husband:

He comes home from work after a long day and takes Ava to ballet class. Then after dinner, he decides the grass needs to be mowed. So he packs up the kids and takes them outside so I can watch Wheel of Fortune in peace. In my defense, I did make him a chocolate milkshake and take him to bed with me at 9pm. :)